3 days to go til Christmas.
Am I happy??? No!
She, and by she I am refering to that treacherous Blob wot lives with me. She is going to her sisters for Christmas. She will be leaving at stupid o'clock on Christmas Day and not coming back til half past hangover on Boxing Day. So where does that leave me - at home alone in the cold house with a cold duvet and cold bed to sleep in. Do I get turkey and all the trimmings? No. Do I get ham on toast in the morning? No. Do I get to snuggle up on her knee to watch Doctor Who in the evening? No.
I am so not happy - also, she has a date this evening. Not a night out with work colleagues, or a quick drink with friends. Oh no, she is going up to London to meet a man for a drink. Did i get to vet him? No. Did I get asked if I minded? No. Did I get deserted without even being fed? Yes. Its at times like this that I am really chuffed we have the other pink Blob. She will feed me because she has a heart.
I'm going to curl up in Blob's bed now to do some serious sulking. If shes really lucky I'll puke on her bed just to get my own back. And that wont be the first time either!
Yours aggrievedly and a not particuarly happy christmas to me - (or tiny tim.)
Bah Humbug!
Bob
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I find, Bob, that if you want to do revenge by puke, the best thing to do is to deposit said upchuck in a shoe or a flip flip or a wellie. It's far more effective if your human can't see it before they step in it (and here speaks a voice of experience -thanks, Phoebe, for the little deposit you left in my sandals during the summer.)
ReplyDeleteAnd I expect a FULL update vis a vis the date with a man. V. excited!!